FALLON: This weekend, a tree frog..oo, leg cramp. FEY: What is it?
FALLON: I got a leg cramp, I can't finish the joke.
FEY: Oh, okay. Stewart, you're in for Fallon!
JON STEWART: Oh man, this is it, I can't believe this! Tina Fey! This is big time, little Jonny Stewart, on network. Here we go, big shot. Okay, this aint cable baby. Screw this up, you're gone.
FALLON: Teresa Castro, one of the co-founders of the Castro Convertible Sofa
Bed Company, died
this week at the age of 85. Castro would have died in her sleep, had not the hard, metal bar from her
fold-out bed been digging into her back.
FEY: This week, Chelsea Clinton was spotted at a Donatella Versace
party dancing provocatively with her boyfirend, Ian Clout. Not to be outdone,
the Bush daughters have set up a meth lab.
FEY: When Stevie Wonder took the stage at the Presidential Gala last Sunday, President
Bush waved to him. Realizing his faux pas, an embarrassed Bush turned to his wife
Laura and said, "Oh my god, do you think he saw that?"
FEY: A man in Washington this week won $50 for eating 80 steamed mussels in one minute.
While another Washington man won $50 for eating 77 smelts in one minute. In a related story,
Anna Nicole Smith won $88.6 million for gnawing on a shriveled, old hotdog for 2 years.